Last night, REM’s “The End of the World As We Know It” came on in the gym.
The few of us there all looked at one another and acknowledged that it seemed apropos.
The song has taken on new meaning in recent weeks. Not the end the world, but certainly the great pause on the world as we know it.
When that song first came out in 1997, we were headed towards a new century, and I was doing a poor job managing my panic about Y2K, even in 1997. (My generalized anxiety disorder showed up at a young age for me.)
We’ve had a number of national and global crises since 1997, but as I’ve heard many people say in the past 10 days, nothing quite like this. And it certainly happened quickly.
When I went to the grocery store on Sunday, aside from an empty toilet paper aisle, I also noticed there was no flour, sugar, or butter. I believe that’s because at times like these, many of us lean on comfort foods as a coping skills.
And why wouldn’t we?
We work hard to develop the healthy coping mechanism of exercise - or acupuncture - or massage - and many of those places are closed right now. Psychotherapy is on pause for many people, or being offered electronically, which can change the entire experience.
Also, there are no sports. Like many of you, one of my most relied upon coping strategies for life is sports. Games, tournaments, fantasy leagues based on those sports can offer a pleasant distraction from the day-to-day demands on our attention. Watching spring training is soothing for me. Reading about March Madness is soothing for me.
Seeing that Tom Brady left the Patriots is…..um….I’ll let that one go….
So today I want to remind you of some of the healthy coping strategies that you have access to - because if all we have is junk food, alcohol, and Netflix, we’re only going to increase our overall anxiety. So here’s a reminder that you can:
Meditate
Have you had a Headspace subscription for a year and are feeling guilty for not using it? Well, now is the time to get your money’s worth. I realize it might be difficult to find space to meditate, especially if you have kids - but I recently learned that my eight-year old nephew is doing it in school and my brother has noticed that it helps his anxiety to practice it. But I don’t have kids so I don’t know what that would be like….
My hope for you is that if you have a busy household right now, you can find five minutes to sit in a closet or bathroom or bedroom and find five minutes of quiet.
If you don’t have a meditation app, please check out podcasts by Tara Brach. She has a number of guided meditations that you can access for free.
Spend time in nature
I spoke with a client yesterday who was feeling incredibly anxious, but was able to get out for a challenging hike and get her sweat on, and it made all of the difference in the world for her. Many of you rely on exercise, and pushing yourself hard in that exercise, to relieve stress. I realize it’s harder to do that right now, but being out in nature can only help.
If you do have time to get outside and want to challenge yourself, try telephone pole sprints. And when I say sprint I made go faster than you were going…
I imagine this is all the more important for those of you who are working remotely, and staring at a screen all day long. As much as technology is helpful, taking a break for your eyes, your body, and your mind is more important now than ever.
Tap into your creativity or learn a new skill
I’m grateful that we live in the time of technology that we do. We have access to websites like Skillshare and Master Class where we can access new information quickly. If I want to learn a new song on the guitar, I can likely find a YouTube video for it. If I want to learn how to write a tv screenplay, I can find information on formatting.
Help others
I have it pretty good right now - but there are plenty of people out there who don’t. Trying to find ways to help and support those with limited resources right now is important for a number of reasons - it helps us to keep perspective and to stay in touch with the way this crisis is affecting everyone, not just ourselves.
Finally….
Laugh
I know, it’s hard right now. But as a parting gift, I’m going to leave you with a poem I wrote a few years ago, when I discovered my first gray chin hair. Facial hair is unsettling for us women, and we vacillate between laughing it off and being terrified that someone will take our tweezers.
Anti-ode to Chin Whiskers..
Big black whisker that grows on my chin
Darker and thicker than those on my shin.
Every morning I pull you out
And every evening, again you sprout
Longer than before.
What is it sir, at which you stare?
Oh perhaps it’s the long black hair
Swinging low from my chin
like a vine, in the wind.
Whisker whisker on my chin
how the **** did you get there again?
Yesterday I plucked you out
But this morning you return with a shout.
Last Monday I had you waxed
And like a cat the next day you’re back
OMG THIS TIME YOU’RE GRAY
I HAVE A GRAY CHIN HAIR
OMG I CAN’T EVEN RHYME ANYMORE
BECAUSE GRAY CHIN HAIR
WHERE ARE MY TWEEZERS????
Be kind to yourself.